I did not plan on waking up and yelling on the phone yesterday morning, but that's exactly what happened. At 7 a.m., I found myself five seconds away from cussing out my teenage cousin from 10,000 miles away, who was trying to present her case of an F in Math. The information, by the way, was not volunteered but had to be dug out. That, right there, are two strikes.
I won't go into details but the husband thinks I'm being too hard on her. This is not the first time I've been told that. I'm unforgiving with grades because we (as in my family) don't have the luxury to play around and waste either time or money. Even my 10-year-old nephew gets an occasional admonition all the way from Virginia, via long distance call, for sloppy homework. Here's how I see it - If you are not privileged in life, you have one shot at doing things right. When you're talking of education, second chances often cost money.
My husband and I are trying to put this particular cousin of mine through college. I believe in her potential and this is my way of paying forward. The idea is to help her so she could help her family in the future. However, I don't think this message is sinking in her head. An F in the middle of the semester? If she were standing two feet away from me I would have probably choked her out.
I set high expectations and I don't take disappointments very well, especially from people who I know could do better. I went to a good university with my parents not having to spend a single cent not because I was exceptionally smart, but because I worked hard. I also struggled with Math (and anything else that had to do with numbers) but at the back of my head I knew that failure was not an option. In short, a half-ass job (as the husband puts it) doesn't cut it for me.
So I am pissed. The husband is, surprisingly, able to stay calm, proposing more dialogues with the offending party to determine what the root problem is. I, on the other hand, simply want to know if we are investing in the right person. Why do people find it so hard to understand the importance of accountability these days?
Posted by fleur at January 31, 2008 12:58 PM